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Posts Tagged: Watching Bad TV So You Don’t Have To

Recap: The Bachelor Episode 7
7 April, 2015
3061 Views

Recap: The Bachelor Episode 7

BIG SWINGING BALL(s)! Sorry, but I mean… In voiceover our Bachelor Art points out that there are some of the Bachelorette’s he hasn’t got to know very well so he’d better do something about that if he’s going to figure out if one of them is his dream girl (looks off into mid-distance (BINGO)). It’s […]

Recap: The Bachelor Episode 6
2 April, 2015
5564 Views

Recap: The Bachelor Episode 6

This episode opens with our usual thoughtful plinky-plonk piano music and Art running on a beach. Art is very big on beach running. It would actually be much better if they just subbed in the ‘Chariots of Fire’ theme for these opening bits, I feel.

Recap: The Bachelor Episode 5
31 March, 2015
3363 Views

Recap: The Bachelor Episode 5

Before we dive into the latest episode’s shenanigans I must address an issue that’s come up in the last week or so, namely that several bachelorettes have started reading these recaps. I know.

Recap: The Bachelor Episode 4
26 March, 2015
4090 Views

Recap: The Bachelor Episode 4

Is it wrong that I’m still annoyed that this has to be on twice a week? Anyway, as per usual we get a rundown on what happened last episode as well as a teaser of tonight’s offering. It’s morning and Art is enjoying a run on the beach but there’s no TORSO, only GUNS.

Recap: The Bachelor Episode 3
25 March, 2015
2257 Views

Recap: The Bachelor Episode 3

Has it only been a week since this kicked off? It feels so much longer. I guess measuring time in TORSO units, it’s about 3 months?

Recap: The Bachelor episode 2
19 March, 2015
4258 Views

Recap: The Bachelor episode 2

Holy shit is this thing on AGAIN? Ah crap. Why did I say I’d do this? Well let’s plow in then. We begin with the obligatory “what just happened” montage followed by a “what’s about to happen montage”.

Recap: The Bachelor Beginneth!
18 March, 2015
5396 Views

Recap: The Bachelor Beginneth!

Okay. Confession time. I know I promised you the recaps but last night when I looked at the TV schedule and realised that the first episode of The Bachelor was on for AN HOUR AND A HALF I nearly bailed then and there.

  • "No, I'm not Mike the pogo stick." David Lynch has nothing on a 3 year old talking to his Lego.,
  • Forgot about so here's a drunk one. ,
  • Kay Eff Seeeee! ,
  • You know you're I'd when you get drunk and all you want to talk about is infrastructure. ,
  • Someone just asked me if I wanted another drink and in answer I raised my arms up and sang "baaabysiitterr". So that's where we're at.,